World's Greatest Dad

Happy Father's Day Nate. Now he will be mad if I get all sappy with this so I will let the picture do the talking.

Last Monday we took Evy to the zoo. Nate can be seen proudly wearing his "Worlds Greatest Dad" t-shirt. Nothing sappy about that.

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As for Evy she seemed to like the zoo except for the jumping monkeys and the noisy macaw. But as you can see she really enjoyed the wolf. It looks like her favorite doggy Hank.




Soon after, she fell asleep.



Too cute.

One last thing. I may not be able to post for a while. I am going in tomorrow for arthroscopic surgery on my right knee. It might be a while before I can hobble to the computer. But stay tuned for upcoming post concerning Evelyn's first birthday bash.

SHE SITS!!!

We have been practicing this for a few weeks. We started by using a Boppy ( a C shaped pillow) behind her. Now we have graduated to a toy between her legs for balance. She is doing so good that I was able to take three pictures of it. Here it is...



She sits...



and sits...



and sits.

Then she falls. As you can see her left hand is still in a fist so she is not able to catch herself. At this point we are working on keeping her hands open. The toy really helps as it gives her hands something to do. Stay tuned, next week we might get four pics...

For the love of reading

Both Nate and I like to read. One of the first things we were able to do with Evelyn is to read to her. While in the NICU Nate read to her a total of 4 novels. Since she has been home we have both read to her. I read to her from her children's books, usually before nap time. Nate will read to her from the newspaper after dinner. Until now she has not responded to being read to. She simply sat and listened until she got board and then started to cry.

Recently she has started to respond, and in a very funny way. While she is sitting on Daddy's lap after dinner she will grab a hold of the paper he is reading to her and she will shake it, eat it, rip it, and throw it on the floor. This is making it hard for Nate to take in the days news but it is a thrill to see her interact with the paper. Also, she is interacting with her books, luckily much more gently. She runs her hand over the pages and if she catches the corner she will turn the page.

We are so happy she is starting to love to read.

Mother's Day Past and Present

Nate and I lost our son in January 2000. He was born at 19 weeks gestation. He lived for 30 minutes. We named him Leo because his little heart beat so strong. We were devastated by his death. I have dreaded Mother's Day ever since. No other holiday/event hurt as bad. In our culture we do not get credit for our relationship with the dead. I always felt my struggle back from deep grief and my continued willingness to try and conceive again spoke a lot about my motherhood. But they do not make a card for these. I lived through eight Mother's Days in this "maternal limbo", so you can imagine the relief I felt this year to be "mom" to my beautiful little Evelyn. Thank you Evy for giving your mother the best present of all. You!

Mom got to celebrate the day with Evelyn's first professional pictures. My present was a day shopping for the right outfit and of course the fun of getting her to smile. Hope you enjoy them as I do.

A Single Krisp of Rice

When I was just out of high school I volunteered for a special needs class at a local elementary school. I worked mostly with a little girl who had cerebral palsy. She was a cute kid; smiled all the time. Her fine motor skills were at a 4 month old level. She held her hands out to her side waving in the air. Yet she was quite smart, she knew her colors and how to count. If you asked her to choose the yellow block she would swing her hand down and sweep the yellow block to the side. I worked with her for over a year. Her knowledge blossomed in that time, but her fine motor skills never did. I have been thinking about her a lot lately. I have been fearing Evelyn would have the same fate. All that changed with one krisp of rice.

Evelyn's trials with her fine motor skills have not been a secret. She has been slow to develop them. She often has her hands out to the side, waving in the air. If you put something in her hand she will hold on and bring it to her mouth but she will not reach out to grab things on her own. I talked to Pat, the developmental specialist from the NICU about it. In her opinion Evy can grab at things she just won't. She explained it like a sort of NICU PTSD (Post Tramatic Stress Disorder). Pat encouraged me to keep offering her things to hold, and so I did. One thing I gave her was food, a big motivator for me. Mostly things like bananas and carrots. I would put them in her hand and she would put them in her mouth but she showed no desire to grab them on her own.

One day I put Evy in her high chair and poured a few Rice Krispies on her tray. I put her hand on the pile and told her they were crunchy. Then I went about preparing her breakfast. One moment later I turned and Evy was chasing one krisp around the tray with her thumb and pointer finger. She had a look of determination on her face. For several seconds the krisp alluded her. Then she got it. It stuck to the tip of her finger with her thumb pressed down on it. She brought the piece to her mouth and opened her grip. The Rice Krispie fell down the front of her and back onto the tray. She staired at the pile, opened her hand and grabbed several pieces. I stood there and cried. Evelyn brought the handeful to her mouth, ate a krisp, decided she did not like it and spit it out.

Now Evelyn grabs at anything in her path. She pulls at my shirt when she is hungry, she grabs at my glasses and hair. She tugs on toys and she loves to put Rice Krispies in her mouth. I can not wait to ask her to choose a yellow block and have her hand me the purple one. Someday...

Baby on the cheap

Evelyn is a million dollar baby. That being said I have made it my mission to raise her on the cheap. I would rather have her in second-hand clothes now and in college later. Yet, there are those days when "momma's gotta shop". So here are a few ways I save money in order to buy "the fun stuff".

First, you should realize you are going to spend more money before you bring the baby home then you will afterwords. Before you drop a ton of money at Babies R Us remember the only "essential" is a car seat. They will not let you take the baby out of the hospital without one. Other than that it is all up to you and your life style as to what gear to buy. Babies want to be in your arms for the first three months and on the floor after that. One big question for the first few months is: Swing, bouncy chair or both? We have both, I bought the bouncy chair at a thrift store for $4.00 and my mother-in-law bought the swing. Even so, I wish I would've had her buy something else and gone without the swing. The swing did save us a few hours of pacing the floor early on but Evelyn rarely uses it now (at 5 months developmentally). The bouncy chair has the added feature of seconding as a feeding chair and so it still gets used on a daily bases.

Second (this really should be first), you have gotta nurse the baby for a year. I have not, and do not intend to buy a can of formula. Formula is expensive, and if your baby needs to switch a lot to find the right brand then you pour a ton of money right down the drain. Of course there are a lot of health benefits to nursing but for me it was the money that got me to do it. Even if you have to rent a good breast pump and go to a lactation specialist to make it work you will save money in the long run. Locally there is a great place called The Lactation Station. A stop there is a must. Another way I saved money on nursing is by buying only a one nursing bra. I found that my sports bras and camisoles work great.

Third, buy store brand diapers. There is no amount of leakage control that can make up for the $4.00 a pack the name brands charge over store brands. With the money you save you can buy an other outfit and some laundry detergent and wash the leak away. Now keep your eyes on the ads and stock up on diapers when the stores have their brand on sale. Walgreen's often has buy two get one free. Free! That is more money for laundry! Speaking of which, Oxyclean is a must. It takes out poop, spit-up and blood.

Forth, make your own baby food. Buy a food puree machine of some sort and make your own stuff. Homemade baby food is healthy and it is cheap. Remember, many cultures feed their babes right off the plate. Just take it slow. Only introduce one new food a week.

And that is how you can have a baby on the cheap.